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Troubled Waters


Author of the Saga of Ukumog discusses the challenges of being an author, the tools and processes he uses while writing, and sometimes posts something completely unrelated. This blog is the author exposed.

Troubled Waters

Louis Puster

Things have happened since my last post in March. Sorry that I have been away, but I haven't felt like I have much to say. Honestly, I need to learn to realize that I should write, even when I don't want to. More on that in a bit.

I went to two conventions in the time since my last update. One was Treklanta, a small-ish Star Trek convention here in Atlanta. The other was Sci Fi Summer Con.

Both conventions invited me to be a guest, which was very nice of them. Though I felt a little out of place at Treklanta, I met a bunch of awesome people, including the amazing Java Green, and I got to hang out with Winfield Strock again, which was awesome. I even got to sit on a panel hosted by Jeff Carroll about Sci-Fi stories and the future of that genre, and even though I am certainly more of a Fantasy guy I had a few things to say that resonated with the group. It was a good time.

Sci Fi Summer Con was a tiny convention. I didn't set up a table at that show but I did sit on a few panels, and I had the pleasure of meeting Robert Midgett at the show as well. The small nature of the show made it very easy to just have conversations with folks, rather than to be separated from the attendees of the show.

Now onto the bad news: I haven't been writing lately.

I know, I know, it is a huge problem. Not just for those of you who are eagerly awaiting the next part of the Ukumog Saga, but also for me. The problem is that there is this storm going on in my heart, and I have not figured out how to calm it.

Let me see if I can explain what is going on:


First, Wrack keeps changing his mind where he wants to the story of the next book to go. This has never happened to me before. Usually, when I sit down to put words on the page, they erupt from my fingers onto the screen. I wonder sometimes if my personal fight with anxiety and depression is causing me to second guess the journey of the story. Not sure.

Second, I have a Science Fiction horror story floating around that I occasionally get inconvenient flashes of, and it is really causing me problems, as my desire to write this completely unformed story will arrive at the worst times and then often disappear nearly as fast as it arrived. Curious that.

Third, yet another story is competing for my attention. A story about three pre-teenage boys who fight something magical in their own back yard. This story is a fictional autobiographical tale about me and my two closest friends from that time in my life. I think it would be quite fun to try and capture a made up story based on some of the people who really helped me awaken my creative spirit when I was a kid.

Lastly, and perhaps the most challenging issue I am currently facing, is that restless depression that I hinted at earlier. Writing is such a lonely journey and I sometimes get lost in the wild of my own imagination. The trouble is that my thoughts often take the easy path towards darkness and I end up wondering why I am doing all of this.

Obviously, that is a silly question. I, like most people who write, simply must put words on a page. Something about us is just wired to paint moments with words to express the images we see inside our heads. This doesn't always go well, of course, but we simply cannot stop. It is a wonderful feeling when there is an audience for the art we create, though. Without that, we are just whispering to ourselves in the darkness.

And that is about the loneliest image I can think of.

A friend recently suggested that I set up a Patreon page to help support me during the writer's journey and might even give me a better avenue for connecting with my most engaged fans. It is a thought, but I am not entirely sure what good rewards for various levels of patronage. Leave me a comment below on what you might like to see if I were to set up a page like that.

Thank you for all your continued support. I could not ask for a greater group of readers. I hope that you continue to enjoy the whisperings that leak from the pages of my books. As long as you keep reading, I will endeavor to keep making things up and writing them down.